Nerding Out on Star Trek

Star Trek has been in the news lately, as J.J. Abrams preps the new movie. It seems that Khan will be the villain again (originally thought to be played by Benicio Del Toro, but that has apparently not happened), though there is also apparently a secondary villain who plays an older mentor to Khan. Or something. It was the obvious choice and I’m interested in seeing what Abrams does with the new movie, but in a lot of ways, it’s also a disappointing and lazy choice. Not just because Khan was the villain in the original second Star Trek film either. As Devin Faraci also notes, I think one of the things people forget about is that one of the reasons that film worked so well was that Khan wasn’t the obvious choice:

Khan wasn’t an obvious choice for the original Star Trek II. Basically Harve Bennett watched every single episode of the original series because he thought Star Trek: The Motion Picture lacked a good villain, and took a shine to Space Seed; while it was always regarded as one of the better episodes of the series, Khan wasn’t quite the iconic villain he is today.

What made Khan iconic was the fact that his quest for vengeance led to the death of Spock. It seems unlikely that Star Trek 2 will be a remake of Star Trek II, so it’s probably a riff on Space Seed – except made more EXTREME for 3D movie purposes. I bet they get Chris Pine to yell ‘KHAAAAAAAAN!,’ though.

I think I would have rather seen Abrams go in a completely different direction. Either mining the original series for other obscure characters to update for the big screen, or maybe even – and I know this is crazy talk – creating a new character from scratch. The Star Trek reboot was extremely popular, so they’ve got a built in audience for this next installment. As long as you can make a trailer with a bunch of lens flares, swish pans, and explosions, people are going to go see the sequel. Why not take a chance? Khan is an iconic villain because of his context – none of which has been built up in this new reboot universe.

Anyway, I got to thinking about the existing movies and just for shits and giggles, I ranked them from favorite to least favorite below. Mostly because this post just wasn’t nerdy enough. Here goes:

  • Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan – The obvious choice, and the film most frequently cited as the best of the Trek movies. I actually haven’t seen it in a while, but there are lots of memorable things about it, and of course, Khan was probably the most memorable of the villains in the films…
  • Star Trek (2009 Reboot) – Oh sure, it’s not a very rigorous movie and I would totally prefer more science in this film’s fiction (and what’s there is just breathtakingly stupid), but this film is just so much damn fun that it really does catapult up towards the top of the list. I’d actually say it ties with the next few films, but for now, this is where I have it.
  • Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home – Who among us hasn’t picked up our mouse and talked to it, saying “Computer? Commmputerrr?” like Scottie does in this movie? It’s an unusual movie in that it’s a sorta fish out of water comedy rather than a sci-fi action film (and quite frankly, those who complain about the reboot’s science should take a look at how time travel is portrayed in this film). Fortunately, it’s still a boatload of fun.
  • Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country – Returning to the series more adventurous roots, this film also wound up being really well done. I feel like I’m saying this for all the movies so far, but it’s a lot of fun.
  • Star Trek: The Motion Picture – I know, it’s slow and plodding and filled with lame glory shots of the Enterprise leaving stardock or something, but I actually enjoyed this one overall. It was a little nebulous and intellectual, but that’s what I like about it.
  • Star Trek: First Contact – Certainly the best of The Next Generation movies, this one is pretty fun, but it’s also much more of a lame action movie than the series or even the other movies. I think this movie also demonstrates that while the Borg were once awesome villains, their continual evolution into ineffectual dweebs was disappointing. They’re better than this movie gives them credit for. This movie works, but there’s lots of dumb things going on here.
  • Star Trek III: The Search for Spock – I’m actually surprised this one fell this far on the list. It’s not a horrible movie and I don’t hate it, but quite frankly, I don’t remember much about it (which isn’t a good sign).
  • Star Trek: Insurrection – Meh. It’s an ok film, and Worf has a space bazooka and everything, but it plays out like a third rate TNG episode. I remember having an ok time with the movie when it came out, but it’s ultimately a pretty forgettable experience…
  • Star Trek: Generations – And now we get to the part of the list where the movies are legitimately bad. This movie was just so unnecessary and got the TNG crew off to a horrible start. It’s one thing to honor the old crew. It’s another to try to cater to everyone, and thus make a movie that works for no one. A horrible movie.
  • Star Trek: Nemesis – Another terrible movie. Hard to believe that’s the same Tom Hardy that was in Bronson and Inception, but yep, that’s him. I’ve always thought that the Romulans would be a good villain for the movies, but it never seems to work out…
  • Star Trek V: The Final Frontier – A total abomination, the less said about this the better.

I think my biggest problem with the Star Trek movies is that I consider a lot of The Next Generation episodes better than most of the movies, even including the ones at the top of the list. And even a lot of TNG episodes haven’t aged that well, but many are still really well done and interesting. Much moreso than the movies, at least. Speaking of TNG, check out this twitter feed which is throwing out humorous plot summaries from a proposed 8th season of TNG. My favorite episode:

A sentient nebula chases the ship, which has nowhere to hide, because usually it would be in a nebula. Data adopts a dog, snake, and parrot.

Heh, great stuff. Speaking of great stuff, RedLetterMedia has reviews of all the Next Generation movies (in the same style as their brilliant Star Wars prequel reviews) that are certainly worth checking out. Well, I think that covers all the Star Trek nerdery I have right now, so there. I hope you enjoyed it.

3 thoughts on “Nerding Out on Star Trek”

  1. I feel like either we’ve discussed what I’m about to say about Star Trek II before or someone wrote it on a website somewhere that I read years ago and I was doing a lot of nodding in agreement at my computer while reading it, but anyway…

    One of the more underrated things I think is great about Star Trek II is the scenes where Kirk’s dealing with the fact that he’s getting older because Shatner actually pulls out a somewhat decent acting performance for those parts, perhaps because Shatner was getting older at that point too.

    I think one of the other things STII has going for it the fact that the Enterprise hadn’t had the shit beaten out of it like that before, so it didn’t seem like A Thing in Trek movies, whereas that basically happens in all the TNG cast-based movies. Well, actually, I can’t remember if that really happens too much in Insurrection, but I don’t really remember much about Insurrection other than a “meh” feeling similar to yours.

    Anyway, my list of Trek movies ranked by how much I like them would be pretty similar to yours, except I’d put the reboot below VI and IV – maybe tied with First Contact. I’d probably move Insurrection down to the bottom too. V is undeniably bad but Insurrection was totally forgettable. I’m not sure which is worse but I know I’ll actually sit there and watch V if I happen to catch it (I guess it’s enjoyably bad), whereas I don’t even bother with Insurrection.

    Actually, I might even put VI as a tie with II at the top. I really love that one.

    One more random reflection: I think Star Trek IV works for a lot of non-Trek people because it’s more a sci-fi movie about saving the whales that happens to have Star Trek characters in it than a could-only-be-Star-Trek movie.

  2. I feel like either we’ve discussed what I’m about to say about Star Trek II before or someone wrote it on a website somewhere that I read years ago and I was doing a lot of nodding in agreement at my computer while reading it, but anyway…

    One of the more underrated things I think is great about Star Trek II is the scenes where Kirk’s dealing with the fact that he’s getting older because Shatner actually pulls out a somewhat decent acting performance for those parts, perhaps because Shatner was getting older at that point too.

    I think one of the other things STII has going for it the fact that the Enterprise hadn’t had the shit beaten out of it like that before, so it didn’t seem like A Thing in Trek movies, whereas that basically happens in all the TNG cast-based movies. Well, actually, I can’t remember if that really happens too much in Insurrection, but I don’t really remember much about Insurrection other than a “meh” feeling similar to yours.

    Anyway, my list of Trek movies ranked by how much I like them would be pretty similar to yours, except I’d put the reboot below VI and IV – maybe tied with First Contact. I’d probably move Insurrection down to the bottom too. V is undeniably bad but Insurrection was totally forgettable. I’m not sure which is worse but I know I’ll actually sit there and watch V if I happen to catch it (I guess it’s enjoyably bad), whereas I don’t even bother with Insurrection.

    Actually, I might even put VI as a tie with II at the top. I really love that one.

    One more random reflection: I think Star Trek IV works for a lot of non-Trek people because it’s more a sci-fi movie about saving the whales that happens to have Star Trek characters in it than a could-only-be-Star-Trek movie.

  3. I’m sure we’ve discussed this at some point over the past 15 years or so:p There are a few scenes that really stick out in my mind about Star Trek II. You mention the whole Kirk/Shatner thing, which worked for me, even at a young age. I first saw this when I was very young though, and some other things stuck out. The earbug thing they stick in Checkov was pretty memorable and horrifying. And I remember loving the whole bit about Khan thinking two dimensionally and thus the Enterprise uses three dimensions to outwit him. It’s pretty simple and probably wouldn’t fly in a movie made today, but still, it was memorable to my young self.

    And you’re definitely right about the damage sustained to the Enterprise. It seems like the Enterprise got completely destroyed in at least half the sequels (especially the TNG ones). But in part II, it was actually a big deal. They actually destroyed the ship in part III, part IV has a Klingon Bird of Prey (which I never understood until I went back and watched III), the less said about V the better, and in VI, the enterprise takes at least as good a pasting as II. I think the enterprise D is destroyed in Generations, and the one after that is severely damaged in First Contact. It’s destroyed or crash landed some other time though. Gah.

    Really, to me, part II is clearly at the top, the Reboot, IV and VI are all very close – we’ll call those 4 the top tier. Insurrection is definitely forgettable, but it’s not quite infuriating like V or Nemesis. Some people hate that sorta mediocrity. I hate bad movies worse. I should watch V again sometime though. Maybe it is bad in an enjoyable way…

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