- The "You know what happens when a toad gets struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else" Award for Worst Dialogue: Avatar. This is quite an accomplishment, though Cameron is certainly no Shyamalan (last year's "winner" of this award). I wish I had a copy of the shooting script so that I could pick out the exact lines, but a big part of bad dialogue is also bad delivery, which isn't especially in short supply here either.
- The Proximity to Jason Vorhees Award for Heroic Stupidity: Friday the 13th. This seems like a no brainer, but this probably could have been a real category if I really wanted to do that. But in the end, it's hard not to give the award its own namesake, right?
- The Divorced Man's Fantasy Award: Taken. There has to be thousands of divorced guys who list this as their favorite movie, right?
- The Blatant Disregard to History Award: Inglourious Basterds. But in a good way (which is actually a pretty impressive feat all by itself)!
- The Blatant Disregard to Physics Award: Star Trek. Red matter? Really? It's not so much that this was the worst movie in this category as that I'm most disappointed by Trek (a movie I still love and which will make my top 10).
- Best Incongruous Action Sequence: The sniper battle in The Hurt Locker. This is the best sequence in the movie, which is weird because it's ostensibly a movie about a bomb disposal squad (those sequences are good too, but they're not as good as this one).
- The "I Can't Believe They Went There" Award for Dumbest Plot Twist: Knowing. This is one of those movies where you guess the ending long before hand but dismiss it because it's so stupid, only to find that it actually was the ending. Touché.
- The Rod Serling Memorial Award: The Box. The movie plays like a feature length episode of The Twilight Zone. It attempts to explain too much towards the end, but is otherwise a lot better than the abysmal reviews its garnered...
- Best Return To Their Roots: Sam Raimi and Drag Me to Hell. I'm not as in love with this movie as a lot of old-time Raimi fans, but it is very nice to see him back in the genre (and he did produce one of the best horror movies of the year).
2009 Kaedrin Movie Awards: Arbitrary Awards
So we're finished with the formal awards, but there are always some other awards that I don't really bother to come up with other nominees for... and there are some movies that have something so uncommon that it's worth bringing up. Interestingly, some of these awards have actually become a yearly thing, despite never really being conceived as such. In any case, here they are: