- The Very Secret Diary of Aragorn Son of Arathorn (My personal favourite) "Beginning to find Frodo disturbingly attractive. Have a feeling if I make a move, Sam would kill me. Also, hairy feet kind of a turn-off. Still not King."
- The Very Secret Diary of Boromir of Gondor "Aragorn suggested we take baths as well. Only realized in nick of time he did not mean with each other."
- The Very Secret Diary of Legolas, son of Weenus "Am definitely prettiest member of the Fellowship. Go me!"
- The Very Secret Diary of Frodo Baggins "Have agreed to carry Ring to Mordor. In hindsight, probably a bad move."
- The Very Secret Diary of Samwise Gamgee "Aragorn just as pervy as Boromir. Obviously fancies Mr. Frodo. Will kill him if he tries anything."
- The Very Secret Diary of Gandalf the Grey "Do not want to go through Mines of Moria, as suspect Balrog still angry about bad date we went on back in Second Age."
- The Very Secret Diary of Pippin Took "Have been kidnapped by Uruk-hai. Not very friendly types. Merry says we may have to shag our way out of captivity. Suspect Merry looking forward to it, useless wassock."
Very Secret Diaries
Time to lighten things up a bit. This Cassandra person is doing a series of stories about Lord of the Rings characters' secret diaries. Its hilarious. Homosexual overtones abound. Check them out: